Monday, February 22, 2016

Valentines is Over- Now What?!

Valentines is over but being romantic should not. Do we go back to being Mr. Grouch, Ms. Naggy Poo, or Mr. and Mrs. War of the Roses (great movie for date night by the way)? I hope not! Now that you have been inspired continue being ROMANTIC and thinking of special ways to be show your admiration, appreciation, and adoration for your special someone. 

What does it mean to be all these things:

* Admiration is defined by the Free Dictionary online as a "feeling of strong approval or delight with regard to someone or something." Its always a good feeling for your special someone to feel as if you are delighted to be with them and approve of who you are. Knowing that the person you spend your time with admires who you are is a feeling that can keep a relationship strong. When a person starts to feel as if they are not delightful or approved by you then a break down can start to occur in your relationship. One way to show your admiration is to simply say it. I was once told tat "one thing about you that I love is how strong you are and how you are supportive of me." This let me know that he approved of the woman I was to him and that it brought him some comfort. Telling someone why you chose them can mean a lot, even in bad times.
Some good articles to read about showing admiration:
For women- http://www.familyminute.com/articles/marriage/general-marriage/showing-admiration-to-your-husband/#.VstDwvlVhHw
For men- http://alltruthisgodstruth.com/2012/08/14/25-ways-to-show-your-wife-you-love-her/


* Appreciation is defined as "the act of recognizing someones worth as a person or showing that you are grateful for something that person has done" according to the Cambridge English Dictionary online. I remember a conversation with someone I dated that had me very perplexed and feeling frustrated. They said that they didn't feel I appreciated them. I am not the one to take advantage of someone and always appreciate someones support, encouragement, help and so forth so this really hurt me that THEY did not feel as if I appreciated them when I did. Even more disturbing to me is that I loved them and that in itself made me appreciate who they were. I can't love someone I don't appreciate, can I? For me, no. So I had to do things (more than saying it) to show them that I appreciated them. I often times hear from couples that "my wife (or husband) does not appreciate me." My response usually is "are you showing that you appreciate them?" Appreciation goes both ways. We want to feel appreciated but we also want to show appreciation. That can be as simple as saying so or doing something to show that we appreciate them like cooking dinner for them, taking the kids out while they rest, or just listening when they need to vent. What we don't want to happen is for someone to not feel appreciated and stop doing things that you appreciate. Resentment has set in at this point and sometimes its hard to turn that around, so show your appreciation for your special someone as much as you can so they know that you admire who they are to you and that you appreciate all they do. 
For women- http://familyshare.com/marriage/how-to-show-appreciation-to-your-husband
For men- http://www.theravive.com/today/post/Happy-Wife-Happy-Life-How-to-Show-Appreciation-for-Your-Wife-0000260.aspx and http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/6-ways-to-show-your-wife-you-appreciate-her/

* Adoration is probably the most important means of being ROMANTIC. Adoration is having a "deep love or respect" for someone. When you love someone you show it by admiring who they are and appreciating them. Loving someone also encompasses other things such as commitment, devotion, loyalty, trust, and RESPECT. Love is not harmful, abusive, demeaning, unfaithful or haughty. When you love someone you do everything in your power to make them happy. You support them. You take care of them. You want to please them. You show it. To adore someone is to have respect for the relationship you have at all times. I can't express enough that if we think about our special someone and make them a priority in our lives then we can not go wrong. This does not mean, compromise yourself. It means that you understand that their happiness adds to your happiness. 
For both- http://tinybuddha.com/blog/52-ways-tell-someone-love-appreciate/ and http://thoughtcatalog.com/chelsea-fagan/2012/11/23-ways-to-show-someone-you-love-them/


All the above is something that should not only be done if you're married. It is also necessary for those who are dating and courting. All of the above are simple to do if you truly feel admiration, appreciation, and adoration for your special someone. Loving someone and being with someone should not be hard. Though relationships are not easy, they should not be an obstacle course and if we show these emotions/qualities all the time (or most of the time), it can reduce the stress that relationships bring and help maintain a healthy ROMANTIC relationship. 



No comments:

Post a Comment