So the holiday season is here and you are either dating someone new, dating someone for some time now or married. What do you do? As a woman who is dating during the holidays and a woman who has been single during the holidays I have to say that being single on the holidays can suck big time and dating during the holidays can be a headache.
However, I do know that the purpose of the holidays is to bring families and loved ones together. So with that rationale in mind, it is important to spend time with not only your family but to make time to spend with your special someone because that's what holidays are about and if you are dating someone who is really into the holidays they will want to include you. Including your special someone in your holidays is a sign of affection, love, commitment and is a sign of the degree of your relationship. So their are some things to consider by degrees:
You just started dating (Cold- Make time for each other):
If you just started dating someone within a couple weeks or a couple months, then you might want to hold off on inviting them to your families house for the holidays or introducing them to all your friends. Reason being, you might not be emotionally attached yet. You might not know where the dating is going with this person. You don't have a commitment to each other yet (or if you do its fairly fresh) and you might be dating more than one person. Remember dating doesn't mean commitment until you both say so. However, if you are dating someone that you really like, set aside a special date to share the holiday spirit together. Do not neglect the chance to spend a romantic evening with the person you are dating during the holidays. It shows that you enjoy spending time with them and you are interested in spending this special time of year with them. It also may be a milestone in your relationship and the beginning of something more (if that's what you want).
You have been dating for awhile now (Warm- Compromise how you spend the holidays):
Once you have passed the 6th month mark of dating someone exclusively, the holidays are a good time to start incorporating the person you are committed to with the people that mean the most to you (family and friends). Now this is something that is taken pretty seriously, so before you take this step, talk to each other about your families and friends, holiday traditions and your relationship. Some people at this time in their relationship are still taking things slow and that is understandable but make sure that you are both on the same page about what your desires are for the holidays when it comes to each other and COMPROMISE. If your families are in different cities then it may be hard to spend the holidays with both of your families, so you might compromise to spend Christmas with his family and New Years with hers. Or you can go your separate ways to your families on Christmas Day and have a post-Christmas party with friends. Including each other is very important during holidays and all other special occasions (birthdays, anniversaries, weddings and more) and lets hope you don'[t have a Meet the Parents embarassing movie moment! Do not miss the opportunity to turn the holidays into ROMANCE for the two of you. If you don't take the step to spend these occasions together then you're really saying that you don't take the relationship serious enough to include them in times that are important and special to You and we don't want that to be the message to your "special" someone.
You are married (Hot- Its about the TWO of You):
You are now married. Unless your families simply can't get along or your families live far apart from each other (or you are in the service out the country) there is no reason that you should not be sharing the holidays or other special moments with your spouse. None! Even if any of these are the case, the holidays are about You, Your spouse and the family the two of You are building. Make sure you spend these times together. You can spend Christmas morning at home with your spouse (and kids) opening gifts with hot chocolate and a great breakfast and then go to his or her house for dinner. It would be awesome if you can split time with each others family for dinner but that isn't always possible. The point: Sharing the holidays should now be your tradition together. Being married means that you are now "family," maybe even more than you are with the rest of your family. A marriage is a bond that can not and should not be broken so you should want to spend the holidays together and all other special times together any way you can. These moments not only reinforce your commitment to each other but to the family you are starting, building and combining. It is also a great opportunity to have some holiday ROMANCE fun!
Next blog will be on how to make the holidays Romantic so start thinking of ideas with your special someone to do so! Until then here are some articles I found when googling this subject:
and I promise this video is hilariously funny! Enjoy