When a person mentions "intimacy" they immediately think sex but being intimate is more about emotions and feelings then sexual intercourse. Intimacy is defined as closeness. Some synonyms for intimacy are togetherness, familiarity, affection, warmth, rapport and confidence. So intimacy can be defined as having a strong connection with someone that you are fond of that you can share your deepest feelings and emotions with that you trust to reciprocate their feelings and emotions with mutual respect. It also involves being there for someone when they need you physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. The important part of being intimate with someone is that they are intimate back. You can not be intimate by yourself. It takes two.
Some people can have good relationships but not be intimate. Intimacy can be expressed without using words, but words are the core of intimacy because it is about expression. It involves sharing a whole range of feelings not just about your relationship but about you as a person, what makes you happy or sad, opposing views, and other more personal topics that you won't entrust talking about to just anyone. Being intimate is often more difficult for men because they are not big communicators or easily able to express their feelings as well as women but men must realize that the more intimate you become with your partner, the more you are able to understand your partner for who they are, including their beliefs, desires, wants, needs and more. Intimacy also gives you an open door to being more romantic with the person that you choose to be with because you are learning about them and what makes them happy, sad, and turns them on or off. It also shows a side of you that women crave for in their mate and can set you apart from the other men in her life. Any man can come along and date you and have sex with you but not every man can learn the deepest part of your being and hear whats on your mind and ultimately in your heart.
I always bring up this quote, but its relevant for so many things. It is true that "actions speak louder than words" but when it comes to intimacy WORDS ARE POWERFUL. Words are what explain the reasons, motivations, outcomes and future actions of a person to another. Its the best form of communication. It is also the best way to express ROMANCE because once you speak it or write it, its set in stone and priceless. Actions can be done and actions can be taken but sometimes actions can be undone or reversed by the words that you sincerely say.
Being intimate can happen in many ways but some ways to be more intimate or enhance your intimacy is to:
* Be positive about your relationship. Do not assume the other knows. Openly express how you feel about your relationship and never forget to say I Love You and I Appreciate You.
* Create opportunities to be intimate and create ROMANCE. Take out time for each other, just the two of you. Easier said than done but important for your relationship to thrive and grow.
* Practice making statements in the first person with "I." One thing I hate is for someone to tell me how I feel or what I am doing. Instead of saying "You don't make time for me," try saying "I would like for us to make more time for each other." Instead of saying "You don't understand" try saying "I think I should explain better."
* Consider each others feelings not just your own. Remember intimacy takes two. You can not have intimacy without another person so consider each others feelings not just your own. Share your feelings openly and do not interrupt your partner when they are trying to do the same thing. Be respectful of each other and understand that you don't always have to share views or agree.
* Know that being intimate is more about words than sex and that intimacy can lead to better sex! Intimate acts of affection such as holding each other at night while you go to sleep, hugging, holding each others hands and the oh so intimate kiss are great ways to be intimate!
Some blog post to refresh on:
Couples Be Supportive of Each Other
Date Night- Make it a Priority
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